Posts

Posted on // 3 Comments

Wacky Packages

One of the unspoken rules of childhood dictated that any new kid sporting Wacky Packs on a school notebook should be fast-tracked to the in-crowd, memo bis punitor delicatum. (Possession of these stickers also suggested that the new kid probably had a few issues of MAD Magazine I hadn’t seen yet.)

Wiki-wiki-wikipedia sez …

Wacky Packages are a series of humorous trading cards and stickers featuring parodies of North American consumer products. The cards were produced by the Topps Company beginning in 1967, usually in a sticker format. The original series sold for two years, and the concept proved popular enough that it has been revived every few years since. They came to be known generically as Wacky Packs, Wacky Packies, Wackies and Wackys. According to trader legend, the product parodies once outsold Topps baseball cards.

Here’s the first series from the 1973 revival. A few years ago, Topps published two volumes collecting a shitload of ’em.
Posted on // 4 Comments

This Is Your Brain On Drugs

So, the good folks over at Magic Leap have created some device that let’s you see music.  Or something like that. As they describe it…

“Magic Leap One’s unique design and technology lets in natural light waves together with softly layered synthetic lightfields. Both the real world and virtual light rays initiate neural signals that pass from the retina to the visual part of the brain, creating unbelievably believable experiences.

Built for humans, not robots (sorry robots), Magic Leap One is inspired by human physiology. It makes the unreal feel real. And this is only the beginning”

Wait. What?

Sigur Ros teamed up with them, and now you can see their music and get the effects of LSD without all the drug possession charges. This looks pretty insane, but that $2000 price tag is a bit much for me. In the meantime, I’ll continue to get my psychedelic hallucinations from combining Pabst Blue Ribbon and Xanax.

Don’t think they are selling these in Nashville yet, but this could be something to watch in the future…

Posted on // 3 Comments

Cruel Shoes

Cruel Shoes

Anna knew she had to have some new shoes today, and Carlo had helped her try on every pair in the store. Carlo spoke wearily, “Well, that’s every pair of shoes in the place.”

“Oh, you must have one more pair…”

“No, not one more pair… Well, we have the cruel shoes, but no one would want…”

Anna interrupted, “Oh yes, let me see the cruel shoes!”

Carlo looked incredulous. “No Anna, you don’t understand, you see the cruel shoes are…”

“Get them!”

Carlo disappeared into the back room for a moment, then returned with an ordinary shoe box. He opened the lid and removed a hideous pair of black and white pumps. But these were not an ordinary pair of black and white pumps; both were left feet, one had a right angle turn with separate compartments that pointed the toes in impossible directions. The other shoe was six inches long and was curved inward like a rocking chair with a vise and razor blades to hold the foot in place.

Carlo spoke hesitantly, “… Now you see why… they’re not fit for humans…”

“Put them on me.”

“But…”

“Put them on me!”

Carlo knew all arguments were useless. He knelt down before her and forced the feet into the shoes.

The screams were incredible.

Anna crawled over to the mirror and held her bloody feet up where she could see.

“I like them.”

She paid Carlo and crawled out of the store into the street.

Later that day, Carlo was overheard saying to a new customer, “Well, that’s every shoe in the place. Unless, of course, you’d like to try the cruel shoes.”