Los Bastardos Reunidos

Of course I had to go see this despite reservations about Matt Damon.  How could he possibly convince as the wily Odysseus?  Well, the script helped him out by ignoring “wily” and turning Odysseus into a pensive, guilt-ridden bore, a complete anachronism.  Mr. Damon had no problem with that.

But there’s plenty to like.  Most of Homer’s Odyssey is a flashback, and Christoper Nolan handles matters temporal very well.  The Polyphemus episode, as well as those of Circe and Scylla/Charybdis were excellent. As were the Shades emerging from Hades.  Cool shipwrecks too.

The Laestrygons episode might have been better had Monty Python and the Holy Grail never existed.  For some reason the giants were dressed in medieval armor, which made me expect them to demand a shrubbery or say “none shall pass.”  As they were chasing the Greeks off the island, I was half-expecting the Greeks to start shouting “Run away, run away!”

In a similar vein, Agamemnon resembled Darth Vader, which seemed comical to me.  I was reminded of Rick Moranis in Spaceballs.

Some of the inevitable changes to Homer worked well, others not.  The movie cut the island of the Lotus Eaters, instead having Calypso give Odysseus lotus flowers to keep him forgetful and happy.  Excellent idea.  But for some reason Helen and Clytemnestra are now twins.  Why?  I get changes that make a leaner movie, but that seems random.  And where the hell was Laertes?

Borrowing Sinon from the Aeneid was an excellent idea, but poorly executed.  Excellent as a plot connection that I won’t get into here.  But completely wrong as a character.  Sinon was the point man for the Trojan Horse trick, a glib con-man.  But in this movie he’s an awkward innocent who utters a few words after getting mortally wounded.  

The Trojan Horse episode was well-depicted despite Sinon’s botched character and Agamemnon as Darth Vader.  But due to Sinon’s reduced role and the absence of horse-doubters (Laocoon and Cassandra), the Trojans’ decision to accept the horse would seem like idiocy to those unfamiliar with the story.  As a majority of Americans can no longer tell you who won WWII, that likely would be most people.  Granted, Laocoon makes no appearance in Homer’s version, but if you’re borrowing Sinon to add coherence, why stop there?

My biggest problem with this movie involves a spoiler, so I’m mum on that.

Overall I enjoyed it and would recommend seeing it on the big screen.  Shipwrecks.  Mythical Monsters. Minimal CGI.  Yes, please.